Friday, May 30, 2014

Bad joke of the day

The FBI had an opening for an assassin. After the background checks, interviews and testing were done, there were three finalists: two men and a woman.
For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. "We must know that you will follow instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside the room you will find your wife sitting on a chair. Kill her!"
The man said, "You can't be serious, I could never shoot my wife!" The agent said, "Then you're not the right man for the job. Take your wife and go home."
The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes before he came out with tears in his eyes. "I tried but I can't kill my wife." The agent said, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."
Finally it was the woman's turn. She was given instructions to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow. The FBI agents asked her what had happened.
"Well, someone had loaded the gun with blanks. But don't worry, I beat him to death with the chair!"


Blogger kinglear said...

Much easier to pistol whip him to death!

6:51 pm  
Anonymous Portinari said...

Kinglear- You worry me somewhat.

10:21 am  
Blogger janerowena said...

I was in Winchester last week - I thought of you as I wandered around. I went to see the Walthamstow tapestry - wonderful.

As for the joke - I expect her husband had had a tooth out after twenty years of putting it of, then used it as an excuse to get out of helping with any chores for several days at the same time as boasting how brave he had been. Where can I sign up?

8:33 pm  
Blogger Whispering Walls said...

Hi Jane- I haven't seen the Grayson Perry exhibition yet - shall try to go - thank you for the advice.

6:42 am  
Blogger kinglear said...

The female of the species is deadlier than the male as you know. I saw a rather good birthday card of two praying mantis - the female is saying " Ok here's the deal, you put up some shelves for me, we make love then I kill you and eat you" Sounds about right....!

4:33 pm  
Blogger Eurodog said...

To think you might be standing next to a nice lady in the supermarket check-out.

1:51 pm  

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