American compliment of the week

"I loved your homily: it was about God and about 10 minutes!"

Headlines of the day

Belgian Prime Minister becomes main man in Brussels

Ex-Standards Committee Chairman refers himself to Standards Commissioner

The three stages of Man

A Horse, Ox, and Dog, driven to great straits by the cold, sought shelter and protection from Man. He received them kindly, lighted a fire, and warmed them. He let the Horse make free with his oats, gave the Ox an abundance of hay, and fed the Dog with meat from his own table. Grateful for these favors, the animals determined to repay him to the best of their ability. For this purpose, they divided the term of his life between them, and each endowed one portion of it with the qualities which chiefly characterized himself. The Horse chose his earliest years and gave them his own attributes: hence every man is in his youth impetuous, headstrong, and obstinate in maintaining his own opinion. The Ox took under his patronage the next term of life, and therefore man in his middle age is fond of work, devoted to labor, and resolute to amass wealth and to husband his resources. The end of life was reserved for the Dog, wherefore the old man is often snappish, irritable, hard to please, and selfish, tolerant only of his own household, but averse to strangers and to all who do not administer to his comfort or to his necessities.

Aesop

Turn wheat into bread

WHEAT

CHEAT

CHEAP

CHEEP

CREEP

CREED

BREED

BREAD

Use of English

Last week we had the embarrassment of reading one of Gordon Brown's letters, scrawled in the sort of fashion which would cause Ed Balls to worry about the effectiveness of teaching the 3 Rs. Today I'm reading a report about the proposal in the US to delay routine mammograms until the age of 50, rather than 40. There is immediate opposition to this idea. One spokesperson says, "It has been proven that women who are regularly screened from the age of 40 die less frequently from breast cancer than those who are not."

Bizarre values of the week

200 one Dollar bills were auctioned for $43.8m (ok they were painted by Andy Warhol) and a gold ring containing a lock of Napoleon's hair sold for $68,000.

Painting of the day