Car of the day

Proof...

that all the people can be fooled all of the time?

Love is...

An 80 year old woman was arrested for shoplifting.

In court the judge asked her, "What did you steal?"

"A can of peaches," she replied.

When asked why, she said she had been hungry. The judge then asked her how many peaches were in the can.

"Six," she said.

"Then I will give you six days in jail," the judge concluded.

The woman's husband then stood up.

"She also stole a can of peas!" he exclaimed.

Grenadier

The Queen she sent to look for me,

The sergeant he did say,

`Young man, a soldier will you be

For thirteen pence a day?'

For thirteen pence a day did I

Take off the things I wore,

And I have marched to where I lie,

And I shall march no more.

My mouth is dry, my shirt is wet,

My blood runs all away,

So now I shall not die in debt

For thirteen pence a day.

To-morrow after new young men

The sergeant he must see,

For things will all be over then

Between the Queen and me.

And I shall have to bate my price,

For in the grave, they say,

Is neither knowledge nor device

Nor thirteen pence a day.

A.E.Housman

Memories of Islamabad

Here's a much better photo of the bride. In the background there are strings of marigolds and red roses which made a stunning pergola.

Bird of the day

 A new species of owl, discovered in Indonesia in 2003, has been named today as otus jolandae or the Rinjani Scops owl. Pity it can't sue for breach of privacy!

Blessed are the pacemakers...

Time!

One of my naughty goddaughters was given a talking watch for Christmas. Her mother was not amused when she set it off in the middle of last Sunday's sermon.

Message for Angus

Hi Angus - your blog hasn't let me write a comment for nearly a week. Have other readers had problems?
http://thericketyoldfarmhouse.blogspot.co.uk/

Hiss!

Happy Chinese New Year of the Black Water Snake!

King Alfred the Great

Now that they have made the discovery of Richard III's bones, archaeologists are keen to dig up King Alfred in Winchester. You will remember that the Saxon Minster where he was buried was replaced by Winchester Cathedral, courtesy of the Normans, and Alfred's body, together with that of his wife and son, was translated to Hyde Abbey, outside the city walls. When Hyde Abbey was destroyed by Henry VIII, the location of the tombs was lost but a Victorian archaeologist dug around where he thought the altar at the Abbey would have been and found some old bones which he thought were Alfred's and they now lie in an unmarked grave in St Bartholomew's churchyard. The main problem, assuming they get permission to disinter them, will be finding a descendent whose DNA can be used as a match.

Dog of the day

A detail from a portrait of Lady Bennet by Hieronimos Custodis around 1590.

Performance review

Some classic performance review comments:

1. He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.
2. This young lady has delusions of adequacy.
3. This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
4. A room temperature IQ.
5. Bright as Alaska in December.
6. His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.