Friday, April 19, 2013

Bad jokes of the day

If toast always lands buttered side down and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap a piece of buttered toast on the back of a cat and drop it?" Steven Wright

The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how much I play, I'll never be as good as a wall. I played a wall once. They're relentless. Mitch Hedberg

According to most studies, people's number 1 fear is public speaking. Number 2 is death. Does that sound right? That means, to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than doing the eulogy. Jerry Seinfeld

I supplied Filofaxes to the Mafia - yeah, I was involved in very organised crime. Milton Jones

I needed a password 8 characters long so I chose Snow White and the Seven Dwarves Nick Helm

I was watching the London Marathon and I saw one runner dressed as a chicken and another one as an egg. I thought this could be interesting. Paddy Lennox


Anonymous Portinari said...

OK Wnchester here is my poor joke offering: Franglais "Sole bonne femme et un oeuf". Could mean: "One good woman's enough". They get worse.

12:39 pm  
Blogger Winchester whisperer said...

Tres bien, Portinari! Did Minor finish the marathon?

1:45 pm  
Anonymous Portinari said...

Yup he did in 4 hrs and 16 minutes. Despite turning his ankle on an abandoned plastic water bottle very early in the run. Talk about knackered. He swears never to do it again. He and Mrs Portinari (minor) have flighted off to Sicily for a few days to recover. Well deserved we are all proud.

3:13 pm  

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